It should be said that my own belief about this mental illness is that there is nothing existentially wrong - it is my reaction to a society construct that I don't fit, and the little pockets of humanity, loving family and friends, nature, music, art is why I'm still around. Real people congregate in invisible circles under darkness as society becomes more homogenised. If this continues to the extent of all time then everything will be the same and there is nothing.
George Ritzer describes this process in society as McDonaldization, which is the belief that everything can be rationalised. However we know that people often act irrationally. So I take this idea that we are rationalising the world and therefore attempting to have all people acting rationally all the time, and propose that this is in fact causing our species demise and the bubbling of mental illness.
I do this by arguing that explicit (Euclidean) mathematics itself does not exist as it is a rational process - the one rational process of analysis that causes nothingness.
I begin this by considering the squaring the circle problem.
The expression "squaring the circle" is sometimes used as a metaphor for trying to do the impossible.
Wikipedia - Squaring the Circle
Then it is necessary to think about transcendental numbers - which apparently don't exist as they go on forever and are known as irrational numbers. But what if it is actually the rational numbers that don't exist - these are numbers like 1, 2, 3, 4 etc.
This might seem like madness to most by now I know. So think of it this way. Everyone understands that everything is decaying. By that logic, and that is ironic (take note Alanis), if you take two items that are exactly the same and add them then the sum will be slightly less than 2. The answer will only be 2 at a certain point in time but we cannot pause time (without Bernard's Watch).
So if you are to solve the squaring of the circle, the squaring the circle problem effectively doesn't exist as neither would you.
So for my own existence, irrationality is necessary.
And hence the irrationality of rationality.
What I am trying to say is that mathematics is an abstract idea that has no relation to the physical world. The world is full of irrational numbers that define how the physical world works so as to be unpredictable with absolute accuracy. It may be argued that the margin of error is so small as to be insignificant, however this may be a simplistic waver. A small error may be greatly amplified as it propagates through unknown systems to have completely unexpected and therefore unpredictable effects. This may be the mathematical realisation of what is poetically described as the butterfly effect.
This is the problem of numbers and using non-human techniques to create order in a society of human beings (who have become human doings in the ordered unfolding Orwellian prophecy). The most natural way to behave is irrationally. The moral is, I think that disorder is caused by order - and I just need to learn to cope with all the order around me and know inside that I'm right.
Order should only be used to create the machines - this maintains our control over them. So if order is being used for humans, who is in control? So I say bend and break the rules but don't be a dick.
I'm a man of science but I'm also a man.
This form of dual rationality-irrationality needs to be skewed more irrationally - thinking, questioning and constantly creating your universe. This includes science, arts, thinking through the unsolved mathematical problems, music, doing things for no particular reason but that you love them.
This includes loving people too,
So I conclude, for everything to work, we must find Bernard's Watch.
